Okama

"Why are we gay?" the man asked in the Japanese movie.
Persecuted, attacked, subdivided, scorned, relegated to corners, angles.
It's not the right question to ask.
A better one to ask is Why society does it to you?
Why is it like that to start with?
It's typical, though. The victims blame themselves.
Oh, yeah, sure, I could spew forth some liberal spiel
about fair and equal treatment for queers and weddings for fags.
But what gets me so riled up is that we're having this talk in the first place.
It's that bloody bible thing that did it (But don't get me started about religion).
Interpretations of what GOD did to the Sodomites.
But who cares!?!?!? !?!?!
You fill a book with vague ambiguous shit and then you're surprised that some people call homos unGODly?

What's with the long hair, anyway?
Are you some kind of fag, or something?
No. I've just got long hair.
Most of the fags I see have it shaved to a stubble, don't they? (But, again, who cares?)
I've been growing it for about five years or so.
Reflects the growth of my apathy?
When I stopped caring about what others thought about my "image", as it were.
No, man, you are mistaken.
I'm no fag.
I'm straight, like you are.Take 2: I'm straight, like you wish you were.
Subconsciously, though, (oh GOD I'm taking PHIL 222, not PSYC 100!)
scared little man, always afraid that some homo will try to copulate with you,
you work out with barbells to try to look too menacing to be raped by a fag.
Yeah, right. Wishful thinking on your part. Some stupid fantasy, to be hit on by a fag.
So that then you can justify to your buddies why you punched his face in.
Would you tell that same story to your mother? She saw you naked first, you know.

I guess I'm just too sensitive (read: fag word) to not jump down somebody's throat when I know that they're being unfair to someone who isn't there to defend himself.
It just got sparked because I saw some Japanese movie about homosexuality.
Man! They're mean to their gays!!!
Not at all like us, anymore.
We've got to be PC and politely hateful of fags.
Sure, real tolerant and nice at the college ("So........You're gay, huh? What's it like?")
but when you come home and hang out with the friends that hadn't yet finished high school, you can all tell them that there are real live fags at Cap! For real!!
They were there in high school, too. Duh.
I feel sorry for you, not your friends. At least they're not fooling themselves with some feigned college attitude of perfect niceness.
Why not just show your derision towards would-be fags?
At least then it will be easier for the rest of us to identify you for what you are.
This is no longer poetic, is it?

--Spring 1996


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